Once there was a way...
I've been thinking about lost things the last week or so. I'm in Portland right now and the trip is going well except for the fact that the airline lost my luggage. By the time I got here, most stores were closed. But, what's this? Nordstrom's is open late due to some cosmetics sale or something! Such a shame! I'll just have to buy a shirt and a few other essentials... (I really like Nordstroms, but these days, I can't afford to shop there).
Last week I was in the Boston area. I lived there when I was in kindergarten. It would have been fun to have gone by the old house, but I have no idea how to find it. Once there was a way...
Sometimes you can reconnect with old friends - like I did at the reunion. It's great when that happens. Sometimes, however, it doesn't work that way. There is a friend who was in my wedding party. We went separate ways and I really doubt I'll ever see him again.
Everyone needs to leave home in various ways. It's part of growing as a person. But if one loses the way back, that makes for a very sad song.
posted by Stu @ 11:32 PM
4 comments
4 Comments:
Sometimes I think about time that gets lost and isn't recoverable. We don't get "do-overs" like we used to in neighborhood sports games. Or another life like in the video games after "game over". As I reflect on times I'd like to do over there are two kinds of time - the kind that makes me wish I could take all I know now back to the person I was then and live it differently. Then there is the kind of time that was so wonderful I wish it didn't end or that I could do it all over again. I guess both serve to inform how I live today to make more days the later kind and to be the person I wanted to be in the former. Rather than finding a way back home maybe its about being the person I am when I'm at home wherever I'm are living.
My beautiful wife said you are being profound on your blog and that I'd better read it. She's a more faithful reader than I have been.
Just about every night before dropping into sleep, I pray Ps. 4, which seems to resonate with my days and with what I see in your postings. Notably:
"Thou hast given me room when I was in distress." I see the Psalmist didn't pray, "You gave me exactly what I prayed for as I perceived I wanted."
Giving us room. Room to storm or reflect or stomp around, or look around, to see farther. Maybe to feel our smallness or what it feels like to be alone. BUT God doesn't abandon us, still hovering over us.
Then there's "Be angry, but sin not." The one thing the Bible isn't is humanly predictable. Tells us to be angry? He knows we will be angry about loss, so okay then, but don't despair.
In the end, we can know a lot in our current states of being, but will only be at peace with all the understanding we can handle after we have accepted and embraced, "Thy will be done (in me)."
You're right, the faith you do have, in whatever measure is infinitely precious because it is real; real in the face of all the dark clouds rolling overhead and inside.
I'm so glad to hear how the depression is fading or has lifted.
Well, got to run. Pray for your goddaughter more. Her turning back from the abyss might be genuine.
clem,
I always pray for her, maybe more than anyone else. I experience it a joy and privilege to have someone I can so purely agape love. And, she receives it so well. That should give you and your beautiful wife encouragement.
I need to give her a call. Now that I'm not traveling, I can make it happen.
Do, do call the girl. Saw her at church last night (Feast of all Saints).
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